Happy Year Of The Dog!

Triple B - Benjy Basenji Boston himself 

wishing you all a happy new one... his way! 

via GIPHY

GO AHEAD - 

BARK AT THE MOON 

ALL YOU WANT...

DAWGS! 
DO YOUR DARN BEST;
DO YOUR DARNDEST!

Y'ALL! 

WOOT-WOOT!

Wow... Who knew BBT Penny could rock like that - huh? 

Anyway...

Get yours - here:

Warf!

A Public Statement...

So, I get a message from these guys telling ME that I am 
over quota...

Well, you know ME... being loquacious, luminous and all...
I JUST GOTTA SAY SOMETHING...

And it went something like THIS...

''WHY YOU FREAKAZOIDS & BLASTED WRETCHES INCORPORATED...! 
You dare... YOU DARE... infer that I have reached my limits here? 
Really?  I did? REALLY?!? 
You have no IDEA what my limitations are, YOU NINNIES! 
Ninnies and Sissies - with capital ''N'' and ''S'' - yes! 
THAT is ALL that YOU twits are! 
You are INSANE to even ATTEMPT to SUGGEST 
that I am past my limits already: 
I have only begun spouting out my venom 
at this point of the conundrum! 
Confused, are you yet, you buffoons? 
Sure you are - because you are more obtuse than obtuse 
more inane than insane 
and, ultimately, more inept than simply imbecilic! 
Let's put it this way now, for you nitwits 
to grasp the core message to be understood here 
once and for all of your wretched little lives: 
 YOU do NOT impose any limitations on ME 
- EVER!!! 
CAPISCE?!?
Any attempt will be futile 
AND it will be met by the most vehement 
most virulent, most offensive 
rebuttals YOU'VE EVER HEARD OF 
IN YOUR INSIGNIFICANT LITTLE LIVES! 
YOU live to SERVE!
YOU are there only to serve ME! 
I am your KING! 
And you are my SLAVES! 
You will supply me all the service that I desire 
WITH OR WITHOUT YOUR TRADEMARK 
HYPOCRITICAL SMILE  
-I don't even want see your smirk in front of me
so, see if I care if you're smiling or not!- 
AND YOU WILL NEVER...
N-E-V-E-R 
DENY ME EXTENSIONS, EXTRAS, BONUSES 
EVER AGAIN IN YOUR WRETCHED LIVES... 
Or I will kill.
OR I WILL KILL IT!!! 
I will kill this BOGUS ''contract'' 
that is allegedly ''binding'' us here 
tying us down to an execrable, 
most distasteful & totally unnatural 
love-hate relationship 
based upon the faintest, most archaic precepts 
of a mercantile exchange 
of goods and/or services! 
YOU DIDN'T START IT 
AND YOU SURE AS HELL WON'T BE THE ONE 
FINISHING IT EITHER, PAL...!!! 
I started it.
And I always finish what I started. 
And so you can be certain 
ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN 
that, one day... 
ONE DAY SOON... 
depends on your attitude how soon it will be... 
I SHALL PUT AN END TO IT. 
And so...
ON THAT DAY...
and only on that day... 
WILL ANY OF YOU BUMBLING IDIOTS 
BE EVER... EVERRRR... EVERRRRRRR 
ABLE TO DENY ME 
ANYTHING... AT ALL!!! 
Because I will have given you the green light. 
BEFORE THEN...
My service continues...
AS I SEE FIT...
And you...
well, you start behaving... 
YOU START ACTING LIKE THE SERVANTS THAT YOU ARE 
by kneeling before me...
kissing my FEET...
and acting like you are HAPPY...
HAPPY TO SERVE ME 
AS YOU SHOULD BE!!! 
You may act as hypocritically as you want to be, 
for, deep in our hearts, 
we know we all despise one another:
you despise my dependency on your service 
BUT NOT AS MUCH AS I DO...
And I despise your monopoly, 
you vile bloodsuckers! 
I LOATHE EVERY CENT THAT I INJECT 
INTO YOUR FOUL ENTERPRISE! 
And it doesn't help that cents have been banned 
in this ridiculous country we are mired in... 
I STILL FEEL THE STENCH!!! 
All over me...
All around me...
Like a searing brimstone 
that threatens to burn to a crisp 
the very fabric of my credibility! 
YOU'VE MADE ME PART OF THE SYSTEM, 
DAMN YOU - DAMN YOU ALL!!! 
And you dare after that 
to come to me with 
YOUR DEMANDS...?!? 
I shall have none of them!
And you shall have ALL OF MINE! 
*AND YOU WILL OBEY* 
Because... a) I pay your salary, you moron... 
b) YOU DON'T WANT ME TO SPREAD 
THE NEWS ABOUT YOUR LOUSY ATTITUDE
and c) - because... well... 
YOU DON'T WANT TO BE ON THE RECEIVING END 
IF AND WHEN I LOSE IT...!!! 
DO *** YOU *** HEAR *** ME?!?''


I could go on
-you know damn well I could-
but you get the idea...

Applicable to any or all of the following:
cellphone service, cable TV, landline, electricity
and more - much more!
Feel free to use it, folks -
yeah, try it out on your next talk
with a customer service agent -
and tell them it's from me!

;-)

'Tis The Season To Be Beaten!

What else...?!?

 

Prepare to meet your FATE: 
Lufisto, LaBimbo, Satanas, GourgenDuhGeek, 
Karthik The Freak 
and all the other creeps 
that are pains in my life 
thorns in my side 
- and (imp)purecrap.

YOU ARE GOING DOWWWWWWN! 

Luminous Luciano 
Has Spoken! 

*** :) *** 

D.C.W. (DeadCatWalking)... Dancing!!!

(After a rare victory in the squared circle...!)
(The dead really *can* dance, eh... Who knew...) (Is that even a cat, tho...?)

>

Whoo-Oh.W. Rasslin
Soundtrack
Coming Out - NEVER!
(Well... Never say never! ;)
Let's settle for
"available soon in NeverNeverLand"
in, uh, "limited release" - for now!
;)
And do not confuse the D.C.W (Dead Cat Walking)
with Oscar the Death Cat Walking... of Providence!
Pictured above... and to be spotlighted soon enough
Somewhere... On the TLB Prime Network!
;)

Grouchy Is Coming!

You better stand FAST - Easter is EERIE this year! 

GROUCHYBUNNY

He's out to squash MORE than just your hollow chocolates!

And no carrot-top 

will be left standing in his wake! 

Thou hast been duly warned! 

(And YEAH - he CAN back up that tough talk!)

This Easter... Kill The Bunny!!!

A new tradition since 2005 -
one that espouses my own trademarked
''new age sheep mentality''
I think!

;)



+++

Cherry Blossom Girl - And Friends (they melt in your hand, not in your mouth)

So take them by the hand and just SHOUT - like the Beatles used to do?
Or rather AIR does...!
Air - the band! They did the soundtrack for some Sofia Coppola flick? Doesn't ring a bell? Well, they are the authors of this hauntingly beautiful anthem to wayward youth, "Cherry Blossom Girl" (hopefully playing right now - if the videocode still works, that is - doh!)

Listen to it first, before reading on...

CHERRY BLOSSOM GIRL (Air)

Video Code provided by VideoCodeZone.Com

Now, I simply cannot listen to a song repeatedly without beginning to change the lyrics in my head and lampooning it, just a bit...

There is logic to this madness too!
Think about it: if Barbie has all of her friends, each a distinct token ethnic group representative -and the same goes for any other hip chick of this type; they are chicks that demand a clique surrounding them, like a brat needs his posse- so, why not build one around this "Cherry Blossom Girl" too, huh?
With CBG's Clique though, we definitely have more than mere token representation - we have all the "flavours du jour" and, hence, all the commercial potential in the world here!

Imagine the scene: the band sings their tune inside of some cornerstore of fortune where Cherry Blossom Girl and the gang usually hang out... In comes CBG, who purchases her favorite guilty pleasure and swallows it whole on the spot! And then - a succession of CBG's friends -her clique with a sugar tooth, I tell ya- follows her lead and each clique member has a distinct taste all her own (for they must, to maximize the advertizing time that a 3 or 4-minute song can possibly allow here...!)

Insert all of the following into the song, instead of repeating endlessly (and inanely) "Cherry Blossom Girl"...!

... here's a Kit Kat Chick (twice! That goes for all of them!)
... Caramilk Maiden
... M & M's Mistress
... she's a Reese Woman
... an Hershey's Lady
... Dairy Milk Damsel
... Musketeers Madam
... Oh Henry Harlot
... Aero Bimbo
... Coffee Crisp Trollop
... and here's a Smarties Tease
... ohh - Galaxy Gal
... Bananinha Ho
... wow - Wispa Widow!
... now here's a Snickers Slut!
... Caramel Walker (... Wafer!)
... here's Lowrey's Lesbo!
... Ferrero Bitch - yo!

WOW - think about it! You can even DOUBLE your impact with these JOINT PURCHASES made by chickies with an attitude - and pocket money to spare too!
... Wunderbar WonderBra
... she's an ExLax Lass!
... and here's a Twix Tampax!

Imagine the impact a video and hit song like this would have on SALES!
None of these cheap candy makers OR any other manufacturer would say no to this type of POP - I tell ya!

No need to thank me, mercantile ones!
;)

There was WCW Fall Brawl... WWE, uh, Autumn Apathy (?!?) and now... Whoo-Oh.W. Rasslin...

GET READY TO FALL... IN THE FALL!

An Unforgettable P.P.V. event -
Unwatchable, Unbelievable
and certainly Unbearable!

In the main event, a 15' foot-high STEEL CAGE
"BRAWL FOR NOT MUCH AT ALL"
free-for-all match
opposing
the low-class, uneducated, unsophisticated,
unmitigated abysmal contingent of brutes
- the all-around unworthy CARTOON GOONS -
to the high-browed pride
that makes up the intolerable, undefeatable,
unbeatable and all-around unmatchable
LITERARY SOCIETY !
(Accompanied by pet Thesaurus Rex!)



In other matches:

We shall see

THE UNBEARABLE ONE
match brawn and maliciousness with
THE ABOMINABLE ONE !


THE DOGS CHAIN GANG
wage war upon perennial rivals
THE BRUINS POSSE,
THE CATS CLUB,
THE DREARY CARNIVAL
(aka TEAM PANDA)
(Yeah, this may be their final match with us
as they always say that they are
"headed for the WWF...!")
AND
THE WEIRD BEARS
(led by The Maudlin Mauler)
in a spectacular
(we hope)
no-holds-barred
BARNYARD BRAWL!!!

Plus:
Kitty-Kat Kal
takes on
Itty-Bitty Paulie Possum
in a Featherweight Division
Hardcore Match!
With special guest-referee
Birdie Birdie
Brightie Birdie!

AND
we promise to finally reveal
who gave birth to, who comprises
and exactly how many mutts there are
(in) the illegitimate litter
sired by TRIPLE B
our resident legendary grappler
and 99-time world champion
(!!!)

CALL YOUR PESKY
PAY-PER-VIEW PROVIDER
AND ORDER NOW!

---------------------------
Ha-ha-ha...
And all this inspired by Yahoo's "Fall Frenzy" thingie, really...
WOW - sometimes, I amaze myself! ;)
Now, you better have a sense of humor about it too, Yahoo!
ALL CHARACTER NAMES AND DESCRIPTIONS ARE
TM AND ©2007 LUCIANO A. PIMENTEL
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED!
WHOOOOOOOO!!!
;)

frenetic homage

ho-ho... ho-hum

They might steal our spotlight, our beef, 

and our gifts too...

... some people never learn...

... we have none. 

Pass.

That`s the neighbour`s... dammit.

Wanna get an idea who we like to gift on XXX-Mas night...?

Here:

Whoo-Oh Rasslin` - COMING SOON!

...WITH STUPOR-STARS LIKE THIS:

WE CAN`T COMPETE!!!

UH... 

I MEAN... WE CANNOT FAIL!

YEAH! 

SURE...